Sunday, August 3, 2008

The Love Generator.

Possibly the laziest submission from Adam (NYC) courtesy of a computer love letter generator at http://www.crazyhoroscopes.com/. Its Gold! Puts you humans to shame...

My dearest Daniel LaRusso,

I trust you are well my darling.

My dearest darling love. I really want you to know that I love you with all my heart.

What human being would not appreciate those fabulous brown eyes of yours which reminds me of the bark of a tree. (By bark I mean the outer coating and not a dog's bark. Just thought I'd clear that up)

I don't know if I've ever mentioned this, but I just can't just help but admire and love your gorgeous brown hair, which sometimes reminds me of a bird nest (only without the eggs and chicks)

You know how much we love going to the cinema together. I think its fantastic that we can share a movie together, although I sometimes have to laugh when you start snorting and laughing out loud every time someone says the word "bush" or "wood". Its also funny to watch you slurp your drink, chew your popcorn out loud, and talk through out the movie, annoying the rest of the movie go-ers in the process.

I can't remember if I've already told you this but I really do love your legs. Its such a turn on to look at and its one of the many reasons I love being with you my love. Sometimes I wish I could do nothing but stare at your legs all day, but I'm not sure that's a good idea my love, as people will probably think I'm some kind of nut case and I might get taken away by the men in white coats.

Anyhow my love, I must bring this letter to an end now. But I must tell you something. I've always wondered what you would look like in PVC underwear. I really think you would be the hottest thing on this planet in PVC underwear and you could easily overthrow any model out there! If you wear those for me, I promise to worship you and treat you like royalty (Just so long as you don't make me clean your toenails with a toothbrush! I draw the line there).

My love grows stronger with every beat of my heart!

With all my heart,

Simon

oxoxo

2 comments:

Mel said...

The reason I like this so much is that I imagine the interface where you have to nominate what colour hair and eyes the person has, what you enjoy doing together etc. But then I lost my shit when I got to the part about the legs - was Adam/Simon trying to reference "sweep the leg" or something?

Natasha said...

Yes indeed. Also, what IS love if not cleaning the other person's toenails with a toothbrush? Honestly, romance comes so cheap these days...